Excerpts: Why Share My Story?

I have no right to call myself one who knows. I was one who seeks, and I still am, but I no longer seek in the stars or in books. I’m beginning to hear the teachings of my blood pulsing within me. My story isn’t pleasant, it’s not sweet and harmonious like the invented stories; it tastes of folly and bewilderment, of madness and dream, like the life of all people who no longer want to lie to themselves.

—Hermann Hesse[1]

Reflecting on and recording my journey was initially for myself. I wanted to be sure I was learning all I could from the work. Writing about it, though, forced me to remember what it was like to feel lost, helpless, and hopeless. If I can help someone avoid that place, or work their way out of it, I started to feel somewhat obligated to do so. The writing also allowed me to accept that my struggles weren’t something to be ashamed of. Finding a new path starts with humility and a willingness to accept help.

It became important to me that people understand they aren’t alone, to encourage them to seek help, and refuse to settle for simply surviving. I’m saddened that many people are never prompted to do this work. They struggle but never realize there’s the potential for so much more. This work requires vulnerability that some people never get comfortable with.  They never grow, and they continue to suffer.

[1] Hermann Hesse, Demian: The Story of Emil Sinclair’s Youth (London: Penguin Classics, 1919).